Who could ever understand?

I was fortunate enough to have my awesome sitter take my boys for a sleepover last night.
Neal and I laughed when we came home from dinner and whispered as soon as we entered the door because we didn't want to wake the boys up. Of course, they weren't even home.

This morning during my quiet time (which is almost always interrupted by the boys), I couldn't concentrate because I knew the boys would pop in at any moment. Next I laughed because again, they weren't here.

My heart immediately thought of Will Mathews mother. I have never met this family. Never been to Calvary and yet God placed them on my heart. I cried as I thought how I was trained already that my boys will always be around but her Will won't. Has she woken the past few morning--after 14 years of having Will around--and automatically think she was going to talk to him again? Did he pop in on her in the morning? Did she go to his room to wake him up or check in on him? Did she add that extra plate for breakfast?

Who could understand her pain? Not me. I've only had my boys for a few years and know I could never understand her pain. Six months from now, would I be thinking about Will as much? Probably not. How often have I thought about Justin Bloxom and his family?

Then I couldn't read anymore so I decided to turn on my iPod and worship. Mandisa came on Broken Halleujah and Mercy Me Finally Home. Amen!

Who can understand that sweet lady and the rest of Will's family? My Father. The one who lost his perfect son. He watched as he was beaten and abused by MY sins and chose to anyway. He willingly gave me Jesus knowing there wasn't a piece of me that deserved it. Could I ever give my son up knowing that I would be doing it to save others and watch as they laugh at my son, murder him and continue to deny his existence? No

I am almost certain I will never meet Will's mom or this will ever come across her eyes but if God allows our paths to cross I may never have the words to say or understand her agony but God does. He has a first-hand testimony